Groove Tonight

2100 hours
27th April 08

well i tought it was gonna be just that, coming back to Subang that is.... but disbabkan kerana on the last return, my dad had said.....

" you balik but you only spend time, most of it with your friends, i think ibu, myself, adik adik semua feel a little bit left out..you should've spent more time with us..."

which brought me from 7th heaven, straight to the pits of terrained hell. but the shittiest thing is, as a "Oh! I love my famil sooo much" kinda girl, hell, that was true. i didnt even have ONE reason to back myself up. macam sial tau.

so this round, im back in SJ, and i haven't pulled the news to anyone ! I came back with suprise, (Dayysss earlier than i told mum i would and heck, it was 8am on a sat'day mornin hehe). i made the decision not to tell sape sape i was jetting back for 3/4 of a week ....

but i've never loved balikking so much !

hehe petang tadi, kita 6 orang adik beradik main PS ramai ramai, shouting and screaming at each other (console nya 2, player nya 5. that is-6 minus Amie yang asyik makan karipap je), and also at Crash Bandicoot. i hadn't remember the last time we even sat together!

then i went over to Subang Gramps, poor nenek, lost half of her left leg to kencing manis (god help her.) and it was nice talking to her too. i didnt talk much tho, i guess i was still in ketidakpercayaan yang my nenek Som, who walked me to Al-Quran classes and masjid events i didnt wanna go to is now on a wheelchair. she pulls,covers her now half leg with het kaftan everytime i look at her . i dunno wther to be sad, to sympathize, to like...i just sat bersimpuh there, watching her talk... picturing her in full suit, doing what she did best when she was at my age, lompat bergalah, and being Kebaya Beauty Queen of god knows where. Hmm. Life sucks.

thirdly, its weird. not seeing my Hasrul for 2 days straight. gosh, we're like belangkas at ITM. i see him like, everyday.
it doesnt feel quite bad, a little sad, a dash of miss and a hint of lust...but im not sure !

what am i ? losing my touch? my supervillain power to feel? am i going inhumane?

god, im beat.

Listening to : Eric Clapton's Tears of Heaven